When we think about depression, we often think about the physical and mental ways it manifests. We focus on the signs and symptoms that impact the individual. However, depression can also have a tremendous impact on your significant relationships. Understanding how depression affects your relationships can help you handle those relationships with care during difficult times and allow your partner to be compassionate, empathetic, and sensitive to your needs. Though it may be challenging, there are ways to manage your depression while maintaining deep, meaningful relationships.
Romantic Relationships
In the last several years, new research has proven what many of us have already known to be true, which is that depression has the potential to impact romantic relationships in a number of significant ways negatively. Couples have experienced not only the emotional toll of depression but also decreased intimacy, isolation, and an unhealthy dependence on one another. Communication is also likely to suffer when one partner struggles with depression, and it can create a lack of understanding in the relationship.
It’s easy for a depressed partner to make the other feel pushed away or rejected. Participating in a relationship takes effort, and during a depressive episode, even the most minor interactions can feel depleting. Depression often makes people suffering from it want to withdraw and isolate themselves. While leaning on others and engaging with your partner might help you feel better, it’s often difficult or seemingly impossible to overcome the desire to retreat into yourself.
Many couples experience a dramatic decrease in sexual interest and intimacy as well. Once again, this is another form of communication and connection that requires effort and energy. Depression can strip you of the desire to do much of anything, let alone the desire for romance.
However, these obstacles are possible to overcome. Depression does not have to stand between you and your partner. One of the best things you can do to nurture your relationship when you are at your lowest is to open up to your partner. Communicating how you feel to the other person, even if it is only to say that you lack energy, is essential to staying connected.
When you feel capable, it’s equally important, if not more so, to talk to your partner about what’s causing you to feel so low. Sharing your feelings and the status of your mental health allows your partner to support you in the best possible way. If you can ask for whatever it is you need. Your partner may not always know how to help unless you tell them. Chances are, they are just waiting for a way to make you feel better. Letting them know how they can care for you will benefit both of you.
Friendships
When you’re feeling depressed, it can be even more challenging to reach out to friends than to a romantic partner. Social interactions are particularly challenging during a depressive episode. However, making a conscious choice to engage in your friendships can have a positive impact not only on your mental health but on your romantic relationship too. Let your friends support you in different ways and at different moments than your partner; they are ready and willing to help.
Sometimes friends can provide insight and love in a different way than our partners. Confide in your trusted friends, and let them know what you’re going through and what you need to get through it. Even if all you want is for your friends to understand that you may say no to invitations and plans more often than you say yes, communicating enables your close circle to be more thoughtful and understanding. Your friends won’t take it personally if you are not as available as you would otherwise be.
Depression is notorious for alienating loved ones, making it difficult to engage in relationships of all kinds. Though depression symptoms are certainly not easy to overcome, navigating challenging times with dedication and effort is possible while still nurturing the most important relationships in your life. Seeking depression therapy from an experienced therapist has been proven to be highly effective. Understanding your needs and communicating them to your loved ones is the best way for those relationships to continue thriving on the most challenging days.
